Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Put in my place...

There is a woman in the office that I work at, for our purposes here, we will simply call her theladythatbugseveryonetodeathsotheyavoidheratallcosts. She is excellent at what she does, very thorough, and typically on top of everything. She is however, extremely overbearing, and as such, people tend to avoid her, much like you try to avoid a serious car accident...or maybe a fork in your eye. Anyway, I was walking down the hall today and who, of all people is coming my way....theladythatbugseveryonetodeathsotheyavoidheratallcosts. So, I decide to take it like a man, keep walking toward her, and God willing, I'll arrive at my office within the hour with minimal damage. As we grow nearer to each other, I can feel the blood pulsing through the veins in my neck, my teeth are clenched like a bear trap, sweaty palms, time actually slowed and the walkway tripled in get the idea.

She is making eye contact with me at this point so what do I do, I say, "Hi....theladythatbugseveryonetodeathsotheyavoidheratallcosts!"

Her reply, "Hmmrph!"

REALLY!!! Are you kidding me. I am willing to bet that I was the only human contact that she has had in 3 weeks that wasn't initiated by her, and all I get was a...half burp/half...go to hell!!! I was suppose to reject her.....avoid her....not the other way around.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go sweep up the shattered remnants of my ego and tape it back together while I whisper self-affirming words of encouragement to myself.


Fonzareli said...

Kinda makes that awkward family fued high 5 deal, notsa bad. You know what I'm talkin bout. I'd NEVER leave ya hangin.

thePatrick said...

Repeat after me:
I'm good enough.
I'm smart enough.
And doggone it, people like me!

pixiepoo said...

Look at it this way. Maybe if you initiate the hello from now on...she will always act that way and never bug you again. It's a blessing in disguise.

Sterling said...

We all know you would never write a story like this about a real person who you actually work with for fear that some day - she whose name I do not mention - stumbles across your blog and with trembling lip and gasps of vengeance, realizes it is her you speak of. We all know that this story is a contorted concoction of truth. Now... bear with me as I vivisect this tale and expose the truth. This occurrence does not portray at work, but some other place like work, with halls... CHURCH! This lady is not in fact a she, but a HE!

I shall not allow another passing in the hall occur where I do not greet you more respectably.

Tiffanib said...

I love your blog stories. they make me laugh!

A "friend" from work said...

I know who she is!!! Everything Anthony says is true, and he is lucky to have survived the encounter with as little psycho-destruction as he did. You the man, Anthony. The woman makes my blood pressure climb like a monkey, and I'm 15 years older than her and remarkably self confident.